I may seem as though I have a truck load of self esteem, but I don’t. Self-esteem is a pet subject Ilike to feed now and then. It’s a pretty heavy subject… not only is it how you perceive yourself in the world but also how you think the world perceives you. IF you think you’re relatively worthless, you’re going to ooze that vibe like a runny nose on the second day of the flu. You can fake it for the world… but you’d have to be pretty darn good at it. The problem with that is when the world is gone, you’re just tat much more deeper in self-doubt, self-hate and a bunch of other selves I can’t think of at the moment.
There is no answer to this. I have wanted to change myself time and time again… but this isn’t Star Trek… and as much as it pains me, I have to use what I have. I make it work, but sometimes it can use a tune up… still other times it could use a total rebuild. Those are the days you sit in the dark. If you make the mistake of listening to other people, that’s fine… just so long as you don’t BELIEVE them. If you believe them, goodbye self-esteem, hello fast food.
You’re fine the way you are. Express… don’t regress. Now if I could only follow my own advice.
